Of all the promises we make in life, the most important ones will be the promises we make to ourselves. When we promise ourselves that we’ll do something, or promise to stop doing something, it is always a comitment to improve our lives for the better. If you make a promise to a friend, I am fairly certain that if you are anything like me, you will move heaven and earth to keep your word. By honoring your promise, it defines you as a person. Promises, kept or not, build or break trust in human relationships. Making a promise is golden. I have been known to break the odd promise to myself though!
In 2018, I have made 5 promises to myself that I whole heartedly intend to honor.
I am so committed to these promises that I have written them up in contract form. They are in my diary, signed, sealed and I just have to deliver on them.
I take contracts really seriously, so by writing my promises in contract form, it makes them more binding for me personally. I want to share the 5 promises I will definately be keeping in 2018, 2019, 2020 and every year from there on end. I hope that my promises inspire you to make a few important promises to yourself if you need to. Your promises might differ from mine, but regardless, there is great power in making a promise.
Promise Number 1
I Promise that I will not tolerate any negative, emotional or manipulative behavior from anyone
You are probably thinking,WOW, that’s a heavy one to start with but seriously, who hasnt experienced some kind of manipulative behavior from someone at some time. Family, friends, colleagues, think about the people in your life.I bet you can think of someone past or present that has been a master manipulator. It is often the case that we tolerate this unacceptable behavior in order to keep the peace and so it continues on and on and on.
It is exhausting and emotionally draining. Not tolerating this sort or behavior requires the willingness to tolerate the discomfort of upsetting the person who is creating the problem and often this can bring up all sorts of fears. Stay calm, speak your truth and know for sure that if the other person’s behavior makes you uncomfortable and it continues, maybe right now is a perfect time to end this toxic relationship. Now, I am refering to those everyday people who are total energy drainers BUT if a person genuinely makes you feel fearful with their behavior, then listen to your fear. If this is something you are experiencing, seek outside help immediately.
Promise Number 2
I Promise to be responsible for my own life choices
I can assure you, I have heard every excuse under the sun over the years from clients as to why their lives are in chaos. Parents, teachers, ex partners, ex friends, horrible bosses…their chaos is never ever their fault! If life hasnt quite gone to plan, you have a choice in how you can handle things. On one hand, you can criticise, blame others and keep rehashing over the mess. In return you will receive an enormous amount of negative energy for your efforts and stay stuck in the chaos. On the other hand you can take ownership of your life and every part of it and learn from the past, grow from the experiences and make serious changes in the future. Dont play the blame game. Instead, find the lesson in all of your hard times and move forward, only looking back occasionally to see how far you have come.
Promise Number 3
I Promise to live a life that feels RIGHT for ME
Give yourself permission to follow the life-path that makes YOU happy…not someone else.
Some people will never get why you do what you do or why you do it. They will never understand your dreams and aspirations and that is ok. I can think of loads of people close to me who have never understood why or the way I do things. Once you commit to living your life fully, honestly and openly, it can certainly clash with the perception of others. But you know what? That is not your problem. It is theirs! Dont fall into the trap of letting others dictate your actions, goals and how you should live your life. This is YOUR life, live it on your terms.
Promise Number 4
I Promise to be a lot more spontaneous
We all have responsibilities and commitments. Life can become so overwhelmingly busy that a strict routine is often the only way to get through each day. Don’t be so rigid with your routines and schedules that there is no time left to play or seize the many magical moments that exist. Live your life with purpose and with intention but also remember that life is best lived in the present moment. Be spontaneous and do little or big things that will break up your routine. Change things up and pay attention to how amazing it makes you feel.
Promise Number 5
I Promise to be gentle with myself
How many times have you said…
“If only I had of done this….”
“I could have done more”
“I am so sorry I did...”
” I could of, would of, should of….”
Life can be challenging, so dont make it worse by being really hard on yourself all the time, especially about the past. The past is gone, so dont stay there.
This beautiful quote sums it up….
“Be gentle first with yourself if you wish to be gentle with others.” ~Lama Yeshe.
Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality so if
you need to write your own set of promises to yourself, there is no time like the present to draw up your contract!
Jo Ettles